Colour Me Pink

Thursday, November 17, 2005
awakened...

grabe, after almost a month (w8, more than 1 month na pala...), nag sink-in nren saken ang stupidity ko.. hayy, thanks to ado... hahaha... pero un talaga eh... last tuesday, nasa coop kme tapos ngkausap kme ni ado... b4 nun, ng nagkita kme, parang tnawanan nia ko... edi tnanong q kng baket.. wala dw.. tapos, mya2 nagtanong.. "tntxt mo dw c toooot (oti)?" parang ako "huh? cnbe nia un?" goshness, so aq pa pla ngttxt sknia?? oo aq nauna.. pero wala lng un... may tnanong lng ako out of curiosity... tapos the following day d q nman xa tnxt a... well, d aq xur kc baka ngtxt aq sa mga sun nun (gruptxt) ng gmorning... pero point is, i didn't open a conversation... xa kaya ung ngtxt ng musta!!! kapal nman ng face... hndi talaga q ung ngttxt! he's the one hu opens the conversations noh... hayy grabe... pero neway... "diyosa aq, nilikha lng xa"... hahaha... pero sbe nga ni ms. E, maxado ko maganda at mabaet para sakania!! grabe, anghel ako kumpara sknia! haha... nga pla, nahihiya aq sa section nia... c ms. E naman e, mang-aasar nlng binanggit pa pangalan ko! nakakahiya tlga!!!! pero dineny naman nia eh... nga naman, txtm8s lng nman kme dba? well, used to be.. hehe... basta ngaun wala na tlga xa! well, more than 2 weeks na xang wala at sa wakas narealyz q ren.. ngayon, pag nakita q xa magh-hi na q.! well, xempre may awkwardness pren pero kakayanin q yan! kapal nman muka q eh! hehe...

from candymag nov.2005 issue p.82 (sakto!):
the nice thing about bad boys is that it really stands out when they do something smart or sweet. But there is a downside to actually dating one of these guys. Real-life bad boys are known to lead girls on. Lots of us find it hard to keep up with guys who are always in search of the next fun thing. It often turns out that what they were trying to find was, just that, fun. The sad part is that time and again we girls fall for the dark, bad boy routine! But after the initial excitement wears off, we often find ourselves wondering what we've gotten into and what we were thinking in the first place.

nabasa q knna, steeg no? todo relate ako.! sayang, kung gwapo lng sana xa baka d pa q nagising ngaun e.. jowk! ah basta, whatever na.. i won't deny na kahit konti meron pa.. pero the value is negligible.. insignificant... hahaha... time to close one of the most stupid chapters of my life!! =)

posted by kai at 11:40 PM

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Wednesday, November 09, 2005
songs pa...

"Promise Me"
by Cauterize

If this is a game, then I don't want to play.
This means too much to me and you're so far away.
But I will wait for you.
We can see this through.
Now it's up to you.
Please tell me, you feel the same way too.

A simple touch, the look in your eye, the sound of your voice.
They do something to me I've never felt but I don't ever want to leave.
Looks like it's happened to me once again.
Things are over before they started, another goodbye,
unless you want to...try and I'll promise you I'll try.

A warm embrace;
it's been a while since I've seen your pretty face.
If you would let me, I don't think I would ever leave this place.
Every shared night just feels so right
when I wake up with you in my arms, staring into my eyes.

Tell me that you'll be waiting.

"Sway"
by Bic Runga

Don't stray
Don't ever go away
I should be much to smart for this
You know it gets the better of me
Sometimes
When you and I collide
I fall into an ocean of you
Pull me out in time
Don't let me drown
Let me down
I say its all because of you
And here I go
Losing my control
I'm practicing your name
So I can say it to your face
It doesn't seem right
To look you in the eye
And let all the things you mean to me
Come tumbling out my mouth
Indeed its time
Tell you why
I say its infinately true

Say you'll stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you

And there's no cure
And no way to be sure
Why everythings turned inside out
Instilling so much doubt
It makes me so tired
I feel so uninspired
My head is battling with my heart
My logic has been torn apart
And now
It all turns sour
Come sweeten every afternoon

Say you'll stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you
Say you'll stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you

Its all because of you
Its all because of you

Now
It all turns sour
Come sweeten every afternoon

Its time
Tell you why
I say its infinately true

Say you'll stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you
Say you'll stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you

Its all because of you
Its all because of you
Its all because of you

"Hanging by a Moment"
by Lifehouse

Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
Closer where i Started
Chasing after you

i'm falling even more in love with you
letting go of all i've held onto
i'm standing here until you make me move
i'm hanging by a moment here with you

forgetting all i'm lacking
completely incomplete
i'll take your invitation
you take all of me

now.. i'm falling even more in love with you
letting go of all i've held onto
i'm standing here until you make me move
i'm hanging by a moment here with you

i'm living for the only thing i know
i'm running and not quite sure where to go
i don't know what i'm diving into
just hanging by a moment here with you

there's nothing else to lose
nothing left to find
there's nothing in the world
that could change my mind
there is nothing else
there is nothing else...

Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
Closer where i Started
Chasing after you

i'm falling even more in love with you
letting go of all i've held onto
i'm standing here until you make me move
i'm hanging by a moment here with you

i'm living for the only thing i know
i'm running and not quite sure where to go
i don't know what i'm diving into
just hanging by a moment here with you

just hanging by a moment
hanging by a moment..
hanging by a moment...
hanging by a moment here with you..

posted by kai at 11:00 AM

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Tuesday, November 08, 2005
updates about him..

my 'siopao' is now non existent... we aren't textmates anymore... and when we saw each other in school... it seemed like we didn't know one another... well, actually i'm not sure... my friend said that when he said hi to us (he didn't recognize us one by one), he was looking at me... guess i was too busy to notice... or, too busy trying to look busy... i couldn't look at him directly... it was so awkward!! and, my best friend told me that while i was in front of him one of his friends who was there called him twice and he said "tol nman, wala nmang laglagan"... what does that mean?? well, a while ago, the person who called him was in the himig room... he's back in himig... and one of my friends asked him if he knew a lot about me... he replied yes to her... but we're not close! so my 'siopao' tells other people about it?? but why.. i'm jst a mere textmate to him ryt (that's what he said)??

ai, nga pla... i have one big question for the world... how did the alumni (05) know about our thing (i do not know what to call it)??? well, one alumna asked me about what was going on between him and me... i was so surprised! i answered her question honestly and asked her where she got the news... turns out it was from another alumna... they were talking about him and they mentioned that 'ako na yata ung bago'... gosh... who told them?? definitely it wasn't him... coz i said above, we don't communicate anymore! so if i was his 'new', he should still be txting ryt?

hayy.. i'm so confused!! and irritated at the same time...
confused because i can't interpret his actions.. he doesn't txt me anymore (he didn't even reply to my text-i said sorry for being snob) but he is shy around me.. i mean, y should he be shy if there was nothing going on ryt? but then again, i may be misinterpreting loads of stuff... argh! its so confusing!!!
irritated because i think it's so foolish of me to still think about him! i'm actually missing him when i don't want to!! knina, i didn't see him in school (well, pretty normal..)... i was kinda disappointed... i wanted to see him... but i didn't want to... hah, ironic!! what i want to say is that i really want to see him but i'm afraid of what might happen if we see each other that's why i don't want to see him... gets?? hehe...

omg, i'm really bothered... waaaaaaahh... i want this to end asap!!!!

posted by kai at 10:10 PM

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Tuesday, November 01, 2005
ewan.!

hayyy.. vacations are suppsed to be fun ryt? bket ung sken hnde??? hahaha...

sabi nga ng kapatid ko wala na raw ako gnawa kundi humiga sa kama ko at mgtxt.. aus lng nman un kc kausap q frends q... pero wla lng... pano kung my gngwa dn clang iba.. pag wala makausap? bihira lng nman un pero naicp q lng... hehehe... kaya thankful na rn ako sobra sa sun... malamang kung hindi unlmtd nagkatamaran na! hahaha... buti rn pala aus na dsl... cra kc khpon eh... d rn 2loi mkpagnet...

miss q na anytime!! grabe... kahet araw2 ku cla kausap, iba pa rn tlga pag physically present eh! hehe... gus2 q cla i-hug!!!! waaaah... gs2 ku ren mkpagkwen2han... wala kc ko sa party ni siops (lorie) nung saturday eh... marami dw nangyare... hmmm.. anu kaya? inuman un eh... hahaha... xempre nakwen2 na nila sken ung iba.. pero c siops d q pa nkakausap ng matino... hehe...

speaking of "siops"... naalala q 2loy... kung nagtataka kayo bket siops ang twag ko ky lorie, well... kung alam nio storya nmen ay mage2ts nio un... icpin nio nlng... siopao... hahaha... ac2ali ngstart lng un ng friday eh... b4 kc kme pmnta sa musikabataan nag club synergy kme.. tapos my pao express sa my tapat nun.. aun... hehehe... nage-gets nio ba??

pero, malamang2 d rn mgttgal ang pagiging mag-siops nmen... balik nachos nlng cguro kme... kc ung dahilan ko sa siops mejo nagiging malabo na eh... fine, nagkakausap pa kme.. pero nabawasan na... ngaun, kausap ko pinsan nia! mgkasama kc cla eh... cguro mmya khet d na cla magksama feel q d q pren xa mkkausap... sa 22o lng, nalulungkot ako... kc d na q mxado sanay na di ku xa kausap eh... ang panget nga eh... nakakairita! d dpat umabot sa ganito... pero dbale, pwede pa iprevent na lumala... mejo mababaw plang nman eh.... hayyy...

oxa, d2 muna... gus2 mag-dota ng aking brother dear... dl xa ng bagong map.. my bagong heroes dw e.. yebah!

*miss ko na tlga edison 4.. lalo na ang anytime!!! labyu guys..!! =)

posted by kai at 5:45 PM

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na22wa aq sa mga kantang 2... mejo can rel8 kc eh... hahaha...

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Damned
Shimoli

Boy you reminded me of putting this things into words and
save them, for rainy days
Your shamefull heart and sinfull soul
Oh I'm amazed by you and all that you are

*your devious ways you do the work of the dark forces in this world
and you're real,oh yes you are...

**Damned, you're one man I just can't stand you
Damned, built your castle on the sand you're
Damned, how could i ever want you for my man i lost you now,
So why do I care?

You really knew right from the start,
How to work
Your way to my heart.
And then you pulled the trigger shot me 'round the weakest
You're a disgrace,to the human race
With your pretty face ------> mali e2ng line na 2... hahaha...

(REPEAT * and **)

Your devious ways you do the work of dark forces in this world
And you're real...oh yes you are...

Tattooed on my mind
D'sound

Baby you'll soon forget about all,
or maybe you'll miss it like I do.
One thing's for sure I'm on a doubt, spend too much time thinkin' of you

chorus
And I can't get you out of my dreams
Now I know that you're the dangerous kind
And your smile is tattooed on my mind
And I can't get you out of my dreams

Don't wanna write,
don't wanna call,
I would not know what to say
It should be you
That's how I want it to be
Tell me you feel the same way

chorus
And I can't get you out of my dreams
Now know that you're a danger first kind
And your smile is tattooed on my mind
And I can't get you out of my dreams...oh!

Oh, Yesterday, I was feelin' safe, oh
All I do today is tryin' to be BRAVE
and no melody can seem to suit my mind...
and now I curse you for being so sweet and so kind

chorus
And I can't get you out of my dreams
Now I know that you're a dangerous kind
And your face is tattooed on my mind
And I can't get you out of my dreams..

Yes I know you're tattooed
On my mind you're tattooed

posted by kai at 3:20 PM

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005
confusion...

hayy.. baket ba malalandi ang mga lalake?? fine, cge.. para sa mga lalakeng mkkbasa ne2, karamihan nlng ng mga lalake.. hehe... pero dba, totoo naman? paparamdam sau na special ka... tapos, pag nahulog ka na, ang masasabe nlng nia sau... sorry pero wala akong ibig sabihin dun... 'cha, nakakairita!!!

teka nga, baket ba ganito tintype q?? shet... e2 nnman aq... mali eh... pero d mapipigilan kpag nararamdaman na... hayy, baket kc ganon... oo na malandi na ko, tanggap ko na... baket ba, tao lng dn nman aq eh! haha.. pero at least kpag nanlalandi nman aq "khet papano" i mean what i say.. di ung parang lasing lng kaya nasasabi ang kung anu-ano... teka, lasing ata ka nun eh... oo tama, nakainom ka.. pero kinabukasan alam mo pa rin nman ung cnbe mo eh... eh bket ganun? sana nakalimutan mo nlng tlga... kc kung ganon, at least dba d aq mxado nkabitin... i mean, d q nman tlga sineryoso un kc alam kong malandi kau ng barkada mo... pero xempre khet papano sa nangyare knnang madaling araw sa pag-uusap nio ni krung, may konting saket... xempre nanlandika na tpos ssbhin mo txtm8 lng aq... fine, tanga ko... binitin ko ung sarili ko dun... pero ikaw kc eh, nagiwan ka pa ng bibitinan ko... lech... hayyy... ayoko na... pero gusto ko... labo noh? katxt kita ngaun... wala lang... d ka nman mapapadpad dito kaya aus lng na i-post q 2... kung mapadpad ka man, eh ano? edi malaman mo... mag-feeling ka na... may ika-fi-feeling ka naman eh... hmmm... sana sa friday makita ko na kung ano ba tlga patutunguhan nito... ang panget tlga ng nakabitin eh... haaaaaaayyyy....

*shet, andame ko atang nasulat na hindi dpat... bangag nnman aq.! khapon pa 2.. oh well... sad ako ngaun.. =(

posted by kai at 10:15 PM

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Sunday, October 23, 2005
masama e2...

1 week na qng hndi nagppost... madame nang nangyare sa napakailing panahon... at pakiramdam ko mali... mali tlga...

ngayon.. narerealyz ko ang importansya ng commitment... minsan kc, khet na pakiramdam mo ay enuf na ang "parang kayo", d pa ren maiiwasan na may ibang factors sa paligid na magpapaiba ng nararamdaman mo... hindi mo naman gusto pero sadyang may mga "tukso" sa paligid na maaaring maging dahilan ng pagkabawas o pagkawala ng feelings mo...

Eventhough

You said you've waited for this for so long, I believed you
You said you and I would go strong, and I took it as truthI took the risk, I took the chance, but you didn't come through
You said you'd kiss the pain away, but you ended up hurting me too

Chorus:
By and by and by and by
You're letting me go
By and by and by and by
I just want you to know

I felt the love you said was real, but it didn't seem right
You gave up on me, you said it with tears and you said good night
You said you'd fix yourself ofr me too, what's taking you so long
And the longer I wait the more I feel that we don't belong
-Chorus-

You're making this decision easier for me, you're pushing me free
Cause you're doing nothing to stop me, baby can't you see
If you only knew that he's pulling me out, maybe you'd start to stand
You'd hold on tightly to my hands and it'll be us once again
-Chorus2x-

I just want you to know, that I still love you so

-galing yang song sa blog ni phimie...

posted by kai at 10:30 PM

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Sunday, October 16, 2005
quotes...

Would you believe me if I tell you that I love you so much? Actually, I’d prefer it if you won’t. Why? So that I can spend the rest of my life proving to you how much I do.

We spend most of our time talking about nothing but I just want to let you know that all these nothings mean so much more to me than so many somethings.

I miss you when there’s no reason to, how much more if there was? I miss you when we talk, how much more if we don’t? I miss you after we’re together, how much more if I see you never? I love you now, how much more later?

If there will be a time you think you miss me, don’t think about it. Instead, try to feel it with your heart. You’ll find out that you don’t miss me at all. Cause you’ll know better, that I never left you.

I love you but you make me cry, you hurt me and make me feel stupid. But you know why I hold on? Cause I know I’ll be crying harder, get hurt even more and feel dumber if I ever let you go.

If I tell you I love you, you’ll think I’m lying. But I’d rather tell you I love you and let you think that I’m lying than to say I don’t love you and know, for a fact, that I’m lying.

posted by kai at 3:00 PM

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